Mirror Mirror on the Wall

mirror me right

Mirror mirror on the wall, who's the fairest of them all?
That’s where most of the answers to life’s queries are. In that mirror on that wall. We all have that mirror. We all definitely question it each time we look into it. The mirror tells you what’s going wrong in your world. The mirror reflects right back at you, all the things that you have offered to the sphere. If only we really knew what to seek when we looked within that mercury-coated sheet of glass. If only we knew how to look beneath the surface and truly ask who's fair and who's not, who's right and who's not, who made it and who didn't...

What is mirroring?

Mirroring is all about reflection. But there’s an art to it. Most of us cannot see beneath the skin when we look into a mirror. We see what lies on the surface and we usually seem satisfied with it. If not we spend hours, days, weeks at the gym or dermatologist or cosmetologist or department stores; and somehow bring ourselves to the level of satisfaction. But that’s not the real reflection we need to better our existence. The depths we conquer make us actualized individuals. Look beneath your own skin. Look into your own character. Your entrenched belief systems. Your deep-rooted thought processes. The established philosophies you live by. And the way you reflect these on the world around you. That’s called mirroring.

Isn’t the mirror a projection?

Some mirrors are custom made to make you look taller. Or slimmer. Or short n round. Or even absolutely distorted. Perhaps what you see inside is not real. How would you know then what to look for? Maybe what you see is illusory? That happens so often today. The world makes you see things differently. Possibly you view yourself the way others view you. And that could be so deceptive. Because there’s no reason to trust people and base your self-percept on the way they see you. Now we have a problem: we need a special mirror then! One that definitely doesn't allow for projection and gives us the true picture of who we are!

How do I trust what I see?

You got it right. You need to look inside yourself and start reflecting even without seeing the glass. There’s no mirror on that wall. It’s within you. You know best who you really are. You know that you lied to your wife today even though no one else does. You realize you sold a bad product even though the buyer doesn't. You understand you skipped going to the gym because you were lazy and not because you had to work late. You don't become obnoxious because of that pimple on your face or those extra pounds on your belly. You get tarnished because of your anger and your lies and your laziness and your procrastinating demeanor.  Believe yourself. You may lie to the world but usually you will be candid with yourself.

Wear those spectacles to see right

You need to alter your vision and start seeing factually. To genuinely know what’s not fine and how you need to set it straight. Stop figuring the shortcomings of others and start the hunt for your own. Often we use projection to overcome our fallacies. We presume that others are rude when in actuality we dislike them and choose to snap at them. We tell our kids to be honest while we speak white lies to our employers about how we need a sick leave to go on family vacation. We tell employees to work harder while we set wrong examples by walking to our own office late. LOOK at yourself. And once you see who you are, don't jump into the sea to die in shame (you may want to!). Wear those spectacles of self-realization and make a difference…to yourself.

Find your focus by changing your locus

We usually lose focus because of our wrong locus of control. Personally we perceive the external locus when things go wrong and vice versa. If we succeed we take the credit, if we fail we blame the world. Alternatively, while we see others we again do the reverse. We minimize their repute when they flourish and blame them highly for their failures. Learn to take control of your own life. Pat yourself for your successes; (don't thrash yourself), but acknowledge your shortcomings and try to better yourself.

After all, if you think you don't have any scope for improvement, how will you rise higher?