If familiarity breeds contempt, and is
considered pejorative; unfamiliarity sure does worse. It can build a sense of
ineptness, diminish confidence and interfere with relationships. Shy
personalities tend to internalize their problems, dwell on their worries and
insecurities within instead of expressing their concerns to near and dear ones.
Seeming unfriendly and inapproachable on the exterior, they suffer silently
with self-brooding and inarticulacy; and predispose themselves to depression
and anxiety. There is a diversity of moods and personas in this universe; each
one is free to perceive as well as express what they feel, how they feel,
whenever and however they feel it. The ones who don’t as much may be
categorized as shy. However they never cease to really feel…
There is seldom an explicit reason to be
weary of situations or people. The fear of rejection distresses all humans.
However, dwelling on falsely estimated refutation is not defensible. Shyness is
a trait; a façade offered for self-preservation against destructive forces. The
object of apprehension is usually the weakened introjected self. The process
begins with the shy individual himself who has a dissatisfactory appraisal of
personal abilities and performance. This prevents self-expression; failure of
the same is adjudged as shyness by the world.
I think I’m shy
Anxiety is habitually misconstrued by
bashful individuals themselves as shyness. They project personal judgments of
themselves on those around them, these bounce back as presumed (but in their
opinion: confirmed) negative appraisals which prevent expressivity, bar
communication, hinder interaction and culminate as coyness. Those who define
themselves as shy often worry about the discomfort they generate among those
around them; this characteristically differentiates them from the ‘not shy’
ones. They ought to be contented with themselves in order to be comfortable
with others and subsequently sense the coziness of their own presence in the
gathering!
Introversion
Introversion may best be cognized as an
emotional memory disorder. Persistent recollections of an occasional negative
or unfortunate behavior get appraised and reappraised; while catastrophic
thinking offers the penalty of negative self-view. This persists at a
subconscious level with an emotional tone attached, prohibiting oneself from
opening up because apparently there is no point in it.
- I am not a fun person to be around
- I will not be acknowledged by others
- They do not want to connect with me
- I will be imposing myself upon them
- I’d rather not speak and just be quiet
Getting comfortable
Situations do play a role in building or
devastating comfort and confidence. It’s important to cherry-pick these opportunities
wisely. When aware of one’s discomfort in social scenarios; it should be a willful
struggle to build faith in the self and others by identifying the situations
and people who assist the same. There is no pre requisite to please the entire
ecosphere; you don’t own the problems of the world. The world can deal with its
glitches if you pledge to deal with yours. Accept yourself, be proud of who you
are. If nothing seems to raise the bar enough, know that you are unique; so are
your successes and failures. Learn to forgive as well as accept yourself for
who you are. If you don’t, no one else ever will…
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