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| tangle or disentangle: make the choice |
The human brain is a complicated contraption with its one billion neurons and more than a few dozen neurochemicals that interplay to stimulate robust and convincing thoughts. Some of these are constructive while others work invariably for the worse of the person thinking them. When this mighty brain within the skull of every human foregoes its ability of filtering thinking, there is transient suspension of rationality. This may well be innocuous, however prolonged dwelling in negative and faulty mindsets transforms the thought process irreversibly, engendering irrational thoughts that are universally acknowledged to lead to unfavorable emotions and negative behaviors…
Loss of control
Those in power ought to be in accurate control and make appropriate choices for their own good. When the mighty use their dominance incongruously, outcomes are seldom positive. Humans can manipulate success and defeat in their minds and react favorably to either, subject to their own critical appraisal of the situation. The human mind can think. It can challenge, ask questions, seek answers and make its own judgments based on them. For a mind capable of thinking 1000 thoughts per minute, thoughts are as potent as weapons. They better be rational and logical!
Common sense
Common sense has interestingly been elucidated by Albert Ellis as a collection of prejudices that are acquired by the age of 18. It reflects things one should ‘not do’ in order to avoid negative outcomes; in other words it simulates logic. The commonality of what most people accept and believe gets designated as common sense; though common sense is also based on facts that have been proven scientifically over time (else superstitions without evidence base would also be termed as common sense just because too many people believe in them). There is indeed a cause to effect relationship, which makes beliefs strong and allows us to consent to the truth in them. Beliefs that get us through in life ought to be as common as common sense.
Weakness: A defense?
Failure is the biggest negative reinforcer of improvement. Usually one selects actions that are most likely to avoid letdowns (or in other words, guarantee success). If one cannot assure ‘evasion’ of failure, many opt to shirk the action itself. The duly perceptive mind is programmed to persistently fulfil its coveted demands. Thus, this ordinarily rational brain now begins to devise fortifications, well understood as psychological defenses. The determination to succeed, and fear of not being able to do so; allows for adjustments in rational thinking. This vindicates the lack of will to try, as well as the letdown if it occurs.
- I don't think I can do this; it necessitates a different skill-set
- If it doesn't go my way, there’s no reason to even attempt it
- If I don't have my way in the relationship, there’s no point
- I need to prove myself or else no one will take me seriously
- If I show my emotions to people I will be taken for granted
- I will not apply for that job because it seems like I will fail
Origin of disadvantage
Childhood sows the seeds of self-confidence, belief systems and determination. Each one has drives; some have the ability to fulfill them, while others may bitterly face more setbacks than successes thereby altering their thinking for the worse. Environmental influencers as well as individual insights from each of them mold everyone differently. Some construct self-regard, while others promote helplessness for themselves and several inculcate a false façade of shallowness and overconfidence.
- People will speak to me only if I please them (reality or sham is immaterial)
- I don't think I should do it that way, what if everyone else is unhappy with it?
- I shouldn’t stand up for myself, others may think I’m rude and abandon me
- I definitely need someone to take care of me; I can’t take my own decisions
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| disentangle and get rational |
I am different from the world
If you exist to please others their interests ought to become your own. That would be a good way of avoiding stress and defending yourself. Else you can dissolve your individuality and drown in self-prophesized faulty postulations that rationalize disappointments. Excellence has always been (and should always be the goal). However, just as the moon has craters; likewise man has flaws. Sensibility lies in identification of faults and attempts to overcome them. When the intent is good, the action better be appropriate, to assure the fitting outcome…
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