It's time to get calculative

Math may not be the only field that makes one excel in life, but the summation of occurrences that add meaning to existence does count. Day after day, week after week, month after month, year after year, the inevitable addition to life is the number of years lived. Birthdays come every year and we have no means to stop them. Until one day the count ends. But till then, the clock ticks. It’s strange that we keep counts of birthdays (a mere addition of years of ‘breathing’) and lose track of things that made this subsistence worthwhile. Or was it ever worthwhile? We dont even know. Its essential for each one to know. Everyone needs some good training in math. To get calculative about life…

Do you have an inner critic?

How often do we look into the mirror; not to see how good we’re looking once well dressed and groomed; but to gaze deeper into the soul, to see who we really are, what our true strength is and which are the values we strongly live by? We have reason to look up to ourselves, believe in ourselves, pat ourselves, and feel content with who we are and what we have triumphed in our existence. Yes, we all need to feel proud of ourselves for survival. It's quintessential for us to know that we have worth. We need it to believe that life is worthwhile. Appropriate appraisals and reappraisals from time to time help people better themselves. And who is a better surveyor of yourself than you?

Behavior modification for parents

It’s so normal for parents to consult therapists for their children’s behavior. You don't realize that your children wish that they could get some treatment for you at times. Just as you wish your kids would introspect and appreciate how much trouble you go through for them, likewise they too feel that you ought to look within and ask yourself how you really make your kids feel about your own behavior towards them. You blame them for making you the monster. You need to step back and ask yourself...

Do you like upset kids?

Bet you don't! And your children don't like it when you're upset with them either. They just like you in the good old normal way. They love it when things are happy and peaceful. It feels good, even for you right? So if they're talking back and being defiant, you must know and understand that if they had a better way to deal with the situation, they'd grab it. Your children don't want to be on bad terms with you. They know it best that they get what they want from you when you are happy with them. They really try hard to please you but often you don’t even realize they do so…

Parenting anger step 2:Healthy choice

agent anger detective

Anger is an emotion, something you feel and something you express (well you definitely want to express it even though at times you curb it). Every emotion does aid some or the other purpose. Just like love, want, desire, happiness, pleasure and other positive emotions enable us to prompt others about what we feel for them; likewise, anger, contempt, dislike, disapproval, all are negative emotions that can be used to unravel some inner drive. The purpose itself has to sound and have some valid understanding. There’s some reason why you are dissatisfied with your child’s behavior. It’s wrong that's why! And there’s a reason why you should not be yelling at them or spanking them. Its wrong that's why!

Do you have ADHD? If not then go get it!

Yes this is the same ADHD i.e. is attention deficit hyperactivity disorder that are parents fret their children may have. It is not fun at all to not be able to focus, to be thoroughly distracted  jump from one task to the other and not accomplish anything of worth; while the rest of the world moves ahead of us because they were absorbed in their task and knew where they wanted to be. Yes we’re not speaking of exactly the same thing. But the hyperactive component of the ADHD if rightly channelized by us in adulthood can be used to our advantage if we only know how to make good use of it at the precise moments in our lives…

Do you mind?

Like really, do you mind?

Well the question here is do you really mind your mind? Do you really watch your psychological wellness as much as you caution for your body? That trivial increase in your body weight, that little pimple, the slight headache; the tweezy stomach; all get your attention at once. You leave no stone unturned; no time, effort or money seems too much to know whether your body is doing fine or not.

And what about giving cognizance to your mind?

• Do you realize you’re more on the edge these days?
• Do you see that you are not in your best elements off late?
• Do you notice that you’re losing your cool more often than before?
• Did you even know that your smile has lost its luster and you’re not really fine?