Success Drivers

Need for success

Everyone doesn’t feel the itch to succeed. Some yearn for it relentlessly but fail to achieve it; others seem nonchalant about it and are always accomplishing tough goals with poise. Success has distinct definitions for different people. Nonetheless, the Olympic gold for the runner equates the daily target of the minimum wage earner when he earns his daily bread; success is sweet, success is rewarding and success is desirable. That definitely makes success worth the effort needed to achieve it…

Good old temper tantrums

Which kid doesn't throw tantrums?

That's a fact: all kids have tantrums. Why kids: all adults throw tantrums once in a while and this is considered normal. We all have seen kids getting upset and crying and probably we ourselves would prefer to screech every once in a while when life is treating us iniquitously. We cannot indeed have a world without tantrums and frenzies. We need to understand these tantrums better so we can take care of tantrummy children effectively…

That negative thought: 2

Thoughts impact emotion. Emotions affect reasoning. Reasoning reflects in words. Words influence behavior. Behavior makes a person. Thoughts have deep rooted connects and intense bearings on the life of those who think them. Affirmative thoughts generate fruitful consequences; they are effortful but they lead one towards happiness. Knowing the defenses that engender pessimism is the first step towards self-recognition and betterment. We know our negative thought is composed of:

Nihilism

Emotional reasoning

Generalization

All or none thinking

Twisting (reality)

Idealization

Vindication

Expectation

Great Expectations

A dictionary elucidation of expectation is something that’s most likely to happen; a belief that may or may not be representative of reality. Anticipations are unquestionably centered on the future; something that not even genius can predict. Expectations can have beneficial outcomes: when they are met there is indeed a sense of triumph but lesser advantageous results assure frustration. If something good happens (that was not at all expected) it counts as wonder. Expectations do take up a large proportion of thought and emotion. Behavior towards people, events and even one’s own self is significantly set by expectations.

Is it all OK? Maybe not?

The perfect world

We await that picture-perfect moment for doing things we always knew we need to do but assumed it wasn’t the right time. The perfect moment to propose to your loved one, the absolute instant for the big business move, the important investment or essential partnership, what more, the right time for a healthy diet, exercise pattern and sleep hygiene; all need apposite scheduling for them to run smooth. Specific patterns to be followed and unambiguous arrays to be maintained; perfection is a commendable dream and each of us desires that impeccable world where everything works without a glitch.

Step into their shoes!

See the checklist below if any of these are your wants:

• My kids mustn’t scream
• Children should listen to us
• They should follow my directions
• Kids should respect their elders always
• I shouldn't have to repeat things to them
• They should understand and do the right thing

If you’ve ticked 3 or more of these (Most will tick all 6), you have some unrealistic expectations from your children. Just like you should not put on weight and your spouse should always understand that you are doing so much for them and your boss should know how hard you work and give you a raise, likewise your kids should do all that you want them to do. How easy is that to expect and how impossible is it to obtain?

Half empty? Half full? Fully half?

half yet full?

Optimism itself seems ironical. You have to be highly optimistic to even talk of optimism these days. Most of us are pessimistic about optimism! The world is not perfect and that’s a harsh reality. It’s not so easy to believe that faith is all you need; and that:

This will work out for the best…

It will surely get better…

It’s going to go well…

It’s just fine…

It’s OK…

It’s not always OK. But we have to make it ok. The glass has water to 50% of its optimum capacity. So really is it half empty, or half full, or fully half?

Expectations vs. reality

The world thrives on expectations...

Imagine a routine day in your life. You wake up and are getting dressed for your school or college or work. You expect a healthy breakfast on your table (your mom cares for your health after all) a bus or a taxi that can take you to where you have to be (you hope there’s no traffic on the road as you don’t want to be late), a smile from your peers (they’re your bets friends after all) a pat on your back from your teacher (for doing your homework well in time) a reward from your parents (for being such an obedient child), a gift on your birthday (its your special day after all), patience and understanding from your boyfriend or girlfriend (they’re your partners they ought to understand you right?), a raise and heavy bonus (because you worked so hard this year), absence of pain and disease in your body (because you eat well and exercise regularly), a long, healthy and happy life…

Now who doesn’t expect that?

Are we realistic enough?